me and my ex (”J”) had a baby in november. he wasn’t in the picture for the pregnancy, and we kinda had the whole “single parent” thing in mind and we were both fine with that. we had been together for a few years before hand, and had broken up a few days before i found out i was pregnant. we were on and off, but a few months before i had the baby, we worked things out, and figured that few months we were split up were a break, and he moved into my apartment. i was paying 855 a month, it was just enough for me and the baby cuz that’s all i thought i’d need. it was too small for the 3 of us. he thought we should get a bigger car (i had a paid off 99 civic that was about 110 a month to insure) for the baby… so we bought a 2004 honda CRV and make payments on it. between the payments and insurance it comes to about 500/ month. we also got a bigger place when my lease was up - over $1,000 a month. i was worried about doing this, and looking back i know that i shouldn’t have so please don’t lecture. he reassured me that things were fine. i was also worried about moving to a first floor apartment (i was on the third before and felt secure by myself because no one can scale the side of the building or whatever) and he reassured me that was fine too. i know our stuff seemed a little pricey, but i did a budget, and it worked with both our income. we even had a few extra hundred dollars every month to save. a few weeks before we moved, he proposed. and not with some cheap ring. that was my major reassurance. we signed the lease a few weeks after, and two days later, we’re moving in. we spend one night there, and he decides to get back with his ex girlfriend that he was dating when i was pregnant. he said he’d still pay me half the rent and half the car payment… but wasn’t gonna pay for the plan i extened on my cell phone and my raised insurance and our higher electric bill from the much bigger place or any of that stuff. he said he’d also give me $90/ week in child support. which on the state website it said he should be giving me $140. whatever. i let it slide. all this equals out to about $260/ week. Obviously not his full income - he was making close to 600/ week. That put me in a position that i was barely able to pay the bills, but i was okay. not good, but okay. i was letting our son go over every week for 3 days usually… and everything was fine.

he moved back in with his parents when he left me, btw. and now, they stopped paying me all together, and he’s suing me for partial custody (visitation) and his parents are going after me for grandparent rights even though they all see the baby at least 3 times a week. he wants 3 days a week and his parents want every weekend.

what the heck am i supposed to do?? i have papers out against me - i have a lawyer on retainer, but i can’t even afford to pay for my car or electric bill… and his family is loaded and has a good lawyer so i’m afraid to just have a court appointed one. i’m trying to get out of my lease, but it was a 13 month so i’m stuck til july next year… and the car loan is for 4 1/2 years. they said his lawyer told him to stop paying me anything because he wasn’t responsible for taking care of me… just the baby. but since he doesn’t have visitiation rights yet, there’s “no need to pay child support”. i’ve offered to finalize what we were doing now - for even less money…. and they just wanna drag everything through court.

i seriously have no clue what to do. financially is my biggest issue right now, obviously. i’m also worried long term - because i don’t feel like i’ll ever be able to trust someone again. i mean we didn’t have some little fling - we’ve been together for years. his parents are playing tricky too. i talked to the rental office to try to tell them my situation and ask if they could let me out of the lease early. the agent said she would forget what i said if i kept making my payments on time but otherwise she’d have to evict me which would look bad to other rental places and i’d have no where to go. i guess they called jeremy, so his parents put everything he owns in their name so no one can come after him for anything because he doesn’t have anything.

please don’t lecture… i know this all my own fault and i shouldn’t have trusted him, but i have no clue what to do from here. my parents dont have the money to help me, i’ve looked for roomates & can’t find any.

does anyone have any advice? i’m trying to get a better job… but can’t seem to find that either.

everything is turning into a dead end. : (

& no, i’m not a troll and i’m not posting this for people to feel bad for me. i just honestly have no clue what to do and i’m at the end of my rope it seems like and could really use some un-biased advice. i’m sick of hearing how i shouldn’t have trusted him and that’s all anyone seems to say anymore….
sorry it’s so long… and to anyone who really took the time to read it… thank you :)

Rent Back Fast

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